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Sis I See You: Taking Up Your Space – A Love Letter to Black Women

Friday, November 08, 2024 | By: Dr. Shinika

To my beautiful Black sisters, I want you to know that I see you. I see your strength, resilience, and authenticity. I see the weight you carry and the light you bring. Now more than ever, we need spaces that honor our lived experiences as Black women—the complexity, the intersectionality, and the beauty of who we are. The world often tries to dim our light, but we continue to shine bright. I want you to know that, Sis, I see you.

This past week has been heavy. We thought we were witnessing a moment of progress, only to be reminded of how deeply entrenched certain forces remain. Our hope felt diminished, our experiences overlooked, and once again, we found ourselves let down by a country built on our backs. But even amidst disappointment, let us not lose sight of the power we hold. We are gifted with strength and talents, and it’s time to center our own needs, to take our rest, and to make space for ourselves.

What we witnessed was a system of institutionalized racism operating exactly as it was designed to—upholding white supremacy and maintaining inequality. We’ve seen it in our careers, in our communities, and in our personal lives. We know the feeling of having to be twice as good, twice as educated, twice as capable, and still finding ourselves underestimated. Being Black and female often means we’re expected to be strong, resilient, and self-sacrificing, often at our own expense.

"I didn't learn to be quiet when I had an opinion. The reason they knew who I was is because I told them."

Ursula Burns

We don’t need to be reminded of our strength or resilience—we know it all too well. What we need is a space to process our experiences, to share openly, and to support one another. We need a space where our reality is not questioned, where our worth is not up for debate. They may admire the idea of us, but they often cannot handle the reality and depth of who we truly are. They’d have us doubt ourselves, dismiss our experiences as exaggerated, or convince us we’re “playing the race card.” But we know the truth. We’ve lived it.

Sis, you are entitled to feel every emotion you have right now. Sit with it, process it, release it however you need—whether that’s through tears, shouts, or quiet reflection. In this season, our assignment is clear: it’s time to prioritize ourselves. To rest, to heal, and to center our own lived experiences. It’s time to embrace our Blackness boldly, to honor our integrity, our culture, and our wellness.

No longer will we fight battles that aren’t ours to bear. Instead, we’ll focus on what truly matters—our health, our mental peace, and our communities. We are done pouring from an empty cup. We’ve often found ourselves running on empty, trying to make sure everyone else was okay. But now, it’s time to refill that cup, to choose ourselves unapologetically, and to take up space that celebrates us, not merely tolerates us.

"No matter where life takes me there will always be someone who's threatened by it."

Franchesca Ramsey

This season is about self-preservation. It’s about recognizing that our mental health and peace of mind are non-negotiable. Let’s be intentional about where we invest our time, our energy, and our love. If something doesn’t align with your values or purpose, let it go. Rest, refuel, and focus on what fills you up.

“The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don't have any.”

Alice Walker

As Black women, we’ve shown up time and again. We’ve done our part. And while we may feel disappointment, we also know where we stand. In the words of Maya Angelou, “When someone shows you who they are, believe them.” This recent experience has shown us where certain loyalties lie, and it’s time we make a conscious choice to put ourselves first.

Let’s be intentional in this new season. Start that business, take that trip, pursue that dream. Go to work, do your job, go home—no more, no less. Stop accommodating. Give back the same energy you receive. We deserve spaces where we’re celebrated and respected, not just tolerated. Take the coming weeks to rest, replenish, and show up for yourself.

We are Black women. We thrive, we rise, we elevate. And that is what we will continue to do, stepping into our best selves with clarity and purpose.

Sis, you are enough. Your voice needs to be heard, your talents deserve to be shared, and the world needs the light that shines within you. This is just the beginning for us, for Sis I See You, and for every sister who dares to show up boldly and unapologetically.

“Your voice has great power; don't be afraid to utilize it when needed. You're not an angry black woman; you're a woman who has something important to say. Your voice matters, and so do you.”
Stephanie Lahart 

Embracing Self-Care and Affirming Our Worth

In this season, as we choose ourselves and honor our needs, it’s essential to ground ourselves in practices that nurture our mind, body, and spirit. Here are affirmations and self-care reminders to keep us centered, empowered, and fully present.

Affirmations for Centering and Strength

  • I am worthy of rest and renewal, and I honor my need for peace.
  • I will take up space, unapologetically, because I deserve to be seen and heard.
  • My well-being is a priority, and I give myself permission to place it first.
  • I am powerful beyond measure, and my experiences are valuable and true.
  • I will not apologize for protecting my peace.

“I don't have to go around trying to save everybody anymore; that's not my job.”
Jada Pinkett Smith

Practices for Self-Preservation

Give Yourself Permission to Rest

Rest is revolutionary. Carve out time each day or week to pause, breathe, and embrace stillness. Whether it’s a quiet morning, an afternoon nap, or a weekend retreat, prioritize rest as an essential part of showing up fully.

Set and Keep Boundaries with Intention

Our boundaries are a form of self-respect. Recognize what drains you, and set boundaries that allow you to protect your energy. Remember that saying “no” is an act of love toward yourself and gives you space to focus on what truly aligns with your purpose.

Connect with Other Black Women Who Lift You

Spend time with people who value and understand you. Surround yourself with a community that supports your journey, celebrates your wins, and encourages you to keep going. Seek out spaces where you’re uplifted and safe to show up as your true self.

Embrace Joy as Self-Care

Joy is healing. Find moments that bring you genuine happiness, and don’t feel guilty for indulging in them. Whether it’s dancing, creating, cooking, or simply laughing with loved ones, prioritize joy as part of your wellness.

Reflect and Affirm Your Growth

Take time to acknowledge your journey and the strength it takes to navigate the world as a Black woman. Reflect on your progress and celebrate the resilience that has brought you here. Embrace each small victory as a reminder of your power.

Release What No Longer Serves You

We don’t need to carry every weight. Let go of obligations, relationships, or thoughts that drain your energy. Focus on what fuels your spirit and aligns with your growth. Center yourself, unapologetically, in spaces that affirm your worth.

Honor Your Emotions

Every feeling is valid. Allow yourself to sit with your emotions, to process them fully. Whether it’s joy, anger, frustration, or relief, honor each feeling as part of your truth. This season is about embracing all of who we are.

Take Breaks from the Noise

Protect your peace by setting boundaries with social media and news. Disconnect as needed to keep your mind clear and your spirit grounded. Choose what you consume, and be intentional about what you let into your space.

Nourish Your Body with Intention

Listen to your body’s needs. Whether through food, movement, or stillness, treat your body as a sacred vessel deserving of care and love. Nurture yourself in ways that make you feel whole.

Celebrate the Woman You Are Today

Recognize that you are more than enough. Celebrate your strength, your resilience, and the beauty you bring to the world. Stand firm in your power, knowing that you are worthy of every good thing life has to offer.

This season is about choosing ourselves, honoring our needs, and affirming our right to take up space. May these reminders support you on your journey and encourage you to continue showing up for yourself with love, courage, and unwavering pride.

“Even if it makes others uncomfortable, I will love who I am.”

Janelle Monáe

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